Dear Sister,

Please don’t follow your heart. Yes, that contradicts what Hollywood and inspirational posters in classrooms across America will tell you, but please do. not. follow. your. heart.

Why shouldn’t you follow your heart? “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?” Jeremiah 17:9 ESV

I cringe when I hear people doling out this phrase like it’s wisdom. I was watching Netflix the other day and heard it. The Mom sat her daughter on the couch and talked with her about a belief the daughter had. She ended up telling her daughter to follow her heart. Of course. I’m sitting there going. Wait, wasn’t the daughter’s heart just telling her to join the cult that worshipped the alien race that invaded Earth and subjugated the humans? So that heart isn’t giving the best advice at the moment. 

It sounds so nice. It even sounds like good, wholesome advice. Follow your heart. As if your heart is the wise, aged character in a novel handing out sage soundbites.

Do you want to know what following your heart really looks like? Cheating on your boyfriend or husband because your heart told you this is true love. Stealing because you deserve that. Manipulating your parents. Yeah it hurts them, but your heart tells you the ends justify the means. It whispers that you don’t have to keep that commitment. It convinces you that revenge is better than forgiveness. Lies.

If I base my decisions on my heart, I’m letting my emotions rule me. I’m not choosing what is right, but what feels right to me in my selfishness.

Instead, we should follow truth. The more I’m immersed in the word, the more my heart is aligned with God’s desires. But I still need to evaluate decision on whether they are good and true, and not whether they fit my whims.

Maybe you say, “follow your heart,” but you really mean, “do the right thing.” I challenge you to rethink what you’re communicating. And don’t make a decision on whether they feel right, but whether they align with truth.

Your big sister,

Mallary

XOXO